International MMA Nipple Tweaking Conspiracy

| September 8, 2008 | 0 Comments

A few weeks ago we posted an incriminating gif of Georges St Pierre fooling around with his nipples before a fight. While this was slightly alarming, we thought it was an isolated incident until…

I think it’s too early to label this phenomenon industry wide. Originally we thought that St Pierre was doing this as an expression of his thinly veiled homosexuality, but Evans has a wife. If you watched his fight with Chuck Liddell, you no doubt heard her screaming like a banshee when he KO’ed Chuck. I’ve considered the facts, and I’ve arrived at this conclusion…Greg Jackson is building life-like androids and sending them in the place of the fighters he “trains”. The nipples are dials that they use to change their behavior programming. They twist the nipples and go from Normal Mode to Killing Machine Mode, and it’s on. Jackson and his fighters are cashing in without doing shit. Well, I guess they’re designing and building sophisticated robots, but that doesn’t sound too hard. Think about it, and it all makes sense.

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